Upper Gauley First Timers’ Trip 2014
| River: | Gauley |
| Skill: | Intermediate+/Advanced |
| Trip Date: | 09/06/2014 |
Upper Gauley
First Timers' Trip
Led by Lisa Birskovich
September 6-7, 2014
Overview
- No shots were fired at the Statesville Wal-Mart.
- The campsite was spacious and pristine.
- All of the first-timers kept their boats on.
- As of last report, nobody fell victim to the tap water.
- Five virgins, Six vets.
- Matt Swaim – virgin, never gives up on a roll
- Jonathan Micancin – virgin, teaches evolution (an abomination)
- Dan Boyle – virgin – smartass
- Mike McDonough – virgin – fastest combat roll of the weekend
- Mark Kieran – virgin, aspiring smartass
- Joe Berry – vet, honey bun hazard, even bigger smartass than Dan
- Matt Daniels – vet, always smiling
- Bret Harrison – vet, big van, many groupies
- Morgan Randal – vet, honey bun safety coordinator
- Jon Godwin – vet, too cool for facebook, free gas
- Lisa Birskovich – vet, Trip Leader, owns own coffee maker
Arriving
As per usual: The most dangerous part of the expedition was getting to and from the river.
While loading boats with Morgan in the lot at the Statesville Wal-Mart, a pickup truck pulled in a few slots away, followed by a number of police cars. Guns were immediately drawn. Morgan looked over to see me cowering behind my car. All I could think to say was: “Hey, there's a guy with a gun over there. You better get down.”
The “guy” was a sheriff, and there were more than one of them, but at that time it seemed like unnecessary info.
We weren't in the line of fire, but not far off line for an erroneous discharge.
After this incident, the rest of the weekend seemed easy.
We arrived at Battle Run Campground to find that our two sites made up about a third of a lakeside acre. Arriving late at night, and having all that room, made it possible to locate our tents at strategic distances from snoring tents!
Our fearless leader greeted us in the morning with a pot of coffee and a smile.
Day One
The first day on the river was a complete success. No swims, nobody worse for wear, everyone delighted that they made the drive.
Insignificant was a blast. After seeing it in all its chaotic glory, I knew I was going to love the rest of the run. I managed to screw up my entry to surf the big wave near the bottom. I'll get you next time you big, beautiful, bastard!
Funnel came with a warning that the hole behind the pillow was tough to swim out of. I tripped just before it, and as I was rolling I could feel myself drifting upstream. I came up just far enough away to not get pulled in.
Matt Swaim got a bit sideways on the way through the line to the left of the pillow. This would have been fine if there had not been a raft surfing in the hole. Matt attempted the classic “slam my torso into the big rubber undercut in order to prevent my boat from rolling under it” move. Only the stern of his boat was under the raft when the inevitable flip happened.
I found Pillow to be more challenging than I expected. It turns out that all the videos I had reviewed only captured the pillow rock, toilet bowl, and VW. I had no idea that we would have to negotiate the gnarr above that in order to successfully set up for a splat (and to avoid the room of doom!)
Brett led the charge; entering the middle line and making it look easy. He even threw a few ends below VW just in case anyone thought he wasn't going for gold.
Matt Daniels rolled just near the pillow rock, and decided it best to wait until he was past VW to roll back up.
Morgan had a similar run.
In my opinion, the splat counts even if it is done while inverted, Morgan.
I had a really uneventful run, a little too uneventful. I decided that I'd have to drop that beginner's luck so tomorrow would be more interesting. It was.
Lost paddle was amazing. Running that rapid without proper guidance would surely end in tears (read that last word either way. It will not affect the validity of the preceding statement.) We all had pretty clean runs.
I was feeling homesick on day one. Lucky for me there was a Mail Slot at Tumble Home, with which to mail some carbon fiber to my loved ones. (See upcoming video report.) Everyone else followed fearless leader's advice – saving their postcards for a later date.
Shipwreck rock was prefaced with the appropriate warnings. We all made it through, keeping our wits about us as we passed near the biggest undercut boulder I have ever seen.
Morgan found a nice, retentive, play-spot on the way to Iron Ring.
Bret found a nice, retentive, play-spot on the way to Iron Ring.
Iron Ring was intimidating from the bank. Lisa instructed us on a counterintuitive line that was perfect for nailing the rapid while avoiding the hole at the bottom. I would never have thought to hit that big wave with a right angle to avoid getting pushed left into the big hole. A few of us ran the lower half of IR upside down but made it back upright eventually in the run out.
Matt Swaim had some epic roll practice at the bottom of Iron Ring on day one (after running the meat of it without issue.) He kept finding obstacles to get in his way, but refused to give up until the boat was back under him. Well played, sir.
I somehow managed to turn the camera OFF before all this went down. We’ll have to rely on our primitive, analog memories for this rapid.
On day one, all of the first-timers ran Sweets with dry hair. Well, we didn't capsize, that is. It's tough to keep the old hair dry when you are momentarily consumed by the hole at the bottom. Lisa instructed us on the proper line, with a very realistic description near the end: “When you get to the edge, it's gonna look like crap. Just give it a little right angle and go with it.”
So true, Lisa. Another counterintuitive, yet perfect, line.
Once the cars were at the takeout, we had just enough time to load up before the rain really set in. Back at camp, Jon Godwin's tarp was just what we needed to stay dry in the rain.
El Patron La Caretta Mi Patron provided a delicious Mexican dinner. We had 11 boaters tabled for the feast. My hope is that the tips made up for the smell. The rain precluded anyone getting cleaned up after the run/before the meal.
Wal-Mart offered little other than entertainment. I walked over in search of micanazole. A formation of rings on my leg were a, um, dead ringer for ringworm. The images we found online confirmed this, or so I thought. It turns out I have a little circle on my thigh pads that I hadn't noticed before that day. It left imprints that looked like the fungus. I'll have to keep waiting for my PFD of ringworm creek.
Back at camp again, Dan lit us a fire.
We did not have enough firewood to last so we sent two ambassadors to the neighboring site, to see if they could get a donation. We're still not sure what went on over there, but Jon and Joe came back with firewood.
A boil advisory had been posted near the faucets that afternoon. We enjoyed the fire while contemplating how many gallons of the water we each had drank in the time before the warning was posted. As far as I know, we all got away unaffected. Either that, or we have better taste than to discuss that on Facebook. (It must be the former, right?)
Day Two
On day two, three in the group managed to get into the hole in Insignificant, and out, with butts in boats. Mike was one. Not satisfied with just that roll, he executed two more speedy combat rolls on the way down the rest of the rapid. I missed the big surf wave again!
Pillow was a blast, again. I entered on the left this time, and was all over the place in my play-boat. Just as I was realizing I was on line for the splat, I realized how close that line is to the one for the room! There's a photo to the right of me looking a bit concerned while trying to get the bow of my boat back on the water (after one of many stern squirts.) I missed the room, and the splat, yet somehow managed to keep my hair dry. The group ran this more clean than on the first day. We were a bit better prepared for its chaotic entrance lines. This is my favorite rapid on the run.
Dan found a nice, retentive, play-spot on the way to Iron Ring.
Lisa's advice did not stop me from getting into the Iron Ring hole on day two. I should have given the curler wave a bit more right angle. While dropping into it involuntarily, I was thinking: “maybe I should buy elbow pads…” It was a quick surf with a somewhat squirrelly exit. As a group, we had a much cleaner run in IR on day two, despite my bringing down the average.
At Sweet's, I was informed that there was still Postage Due on the fibers I shipped from Mail Slot the day before. I tried the meltdown move. I made my accidental 180 rock spin look intentional, missed a few rolls, then got to explore the cracks on the left of the Postage Due. That portion of the video report may require bleeps.
Everyone else had good runs through Sweet's. Morgan nailed a 360 rock spin into the meltdown drop!
We took off early to get back on the road at a reasonable hour. Morgan's truck was no doubt happy that we went back to camp for a shower before we got under way!
This run is my new favorite run.
Thank you, Lisa, for introducing us!
Here's video from the trip.
If you're reading this, and the UG is for you, go with Lisa next year!